Labor Day

Leila Maria Rodriguez Larrazabal.


That's what we named our heaven-sent little angel.


Born at exactly 1:00 pm on May 1st, 2010, a Saturday. (Yes, I literally went on labor on Labor Day - in the Philippines, anyhow.)


I was 5 days past my expected due date. Early that Saturday morning (about 1:00 am), I felt something weird - all those weeks prior, every single "feeling" I got, I thought I was in labor already; well, this was my first baby, naturally, I had no idea what labor pains felt like. That time, though, the "pains" were more persistent. I could no longer go to sleep - while my dear husband snored the night away. Hours passed and I still couldn't go to sleep; the pains were becoming more intense. Then, I knew this has got to be IT. At about 5 am, I couldn't wait any longer, I woke up Pancho and told him this was IT. I then woke up my mom in the next room, and I told her to get dressed. I still remember the big smile on her face, ever the excited grandmother. She asked, "Are you sure this is it?" I told her I knew for sure. We took our time, though. I managed to make some toast and eat it. We all sat on the table, while my dear husband packed everything into the car. Nothing was sinking in just yet. Is this really it, I remember thinking to myself.


Soon enough, we headed to Kaiser Permanente, where I was to deliver my baby, at around 7am. We checked in and soon enough, I was laying in bed, still feeling all those contractions becoming more intense by the minute. BUT, they were never as bad as they looked on TV or in the movies. Doctors then came to check on me, torturing me with IEs (internal examinations - yes, internal and deeeeeep; urrrrgghh, I hate to remember how those felt), and finally told me I was barely dilating - only half a cm after all those hours of contractions! I was already 5 days past my 40 weeks! This baby was enjoying my womb too much. Alas, the doctor made us choose with either being induced and waiting it out but that she thought it might take longer and my fluid was running low and the baby's heart rate was fluctuating already OR that I go through C-section. I never once thought we'd ever have to make that choice. The doctor left me and Pancho to talk things through. Before I knew it, I was sobbing like a baby. I was so scared - I've never been operated on before, ever; heck, I was never hospitalized ever before. I wasn't talking sense anymore, my husband just kept hugging me, comforting me.. We had to decide soon, so we called in the doctor and told her our decision. Everything from there just happened so fast. But I do remember some darn (pardon the term, but she really was!!!) nurse who put on my IV line and screwed it up twice before she finally got it; to think my vein was practically popping out, calling out her name! Shortly after, I was taken to the operating room. It was sooooo cold, that I remember. And who could ever forget the epidural shot?! Pancho had to change and suit up first before he could enter the OR, so it was just me, the anesthesiologist and the nurse. I had to beg the nurse that I needed to hold on to someone before the doctor gave me the shot. It was crazyyyy painful, to say the very least.


From thereon, everything just happened in a blur - as if on fast forward mode - the anesthesia did its job and numbed me from chest down. I could feel some pressure - apparently, they were slicing me open, pushing or pulling (???) the baby out. It seemed like it only took five minutes from the moment they opened me up when I heard the most amazing sound a mother would ever hear - her baby's first loud crying! Pancho, who was just beside me all this time (yep, we were just chatting and laughing while waiting for Leila to come out - cool huh?), and I just cried, seeing our little one. Needless to say, it was love at first sight! She was sooooo white and had sooooo much black hair! 


It took a while before they finished "sewing me up", but all in all, everything in that operating room happened in exactly one hour. 


I could barely believe that in just twelve hours from when my contractions started, here I was holding my little angel in my arms. It felt so surreal. 


This was my baby. This is my baby. Yes, THE one I was carrying for nine whole months.

So, as you can see, Labor Day couldn't have come any sooner! If I only knew she would be this adorable, I'd definitely have had her sooner =)

I miss...

ORMOC.


I miss everything Ormoc.


I always said I'd live and die in Ormoc. I've always loved Ormoc, wholeheartedly. Even when I went to college in Cebu, I always knew I'd go back to Ormoc after, settle there and all. Alas, God had different plans for me. I know life's turned out better - because I know the life I am now living (and enjoying!) is what He thinks is best for me  and my loved ones.


But still...


I miss everything (and everyone!) in Ormoc.


I miss...


HOME. Everything in it, everyone in it. From my parents and siblings, to the household help, to the dogs, turkeys, roosters (believe me, I miss most the yabag tugtuga-ok of the roosters at 5 am!). I miss the sight of Poppy in prayer early in the mornings, having coffee with him; I miss Mommy's automatic early morning "Noy Kayooooo!" I miss my brother's stories, my little sister's endless questions, my other sisters' newest adventures! I miss Nang Boning's cooking; the ease with which I could just ask our reliable secretary, Lerma, to do groceries or buy a particular medicine. 


FOOD. No matter how Filipino food here in the US has become more accessible than in yesteryears, it still does not compare to how food is at "home". Somehow, Filipino dish here has a tad bit of an American touch, it just doesn't taste like "home". It's just not as good as our home-cooked meals. I miss Nang Inday's fried chicken, dinuguan, crabs, shrimps and pork barbecue. I miss Pardis' fried chicken skin and chicken barbecue. I miss Nang Boning's pork steak. I miss my mother's food inventions. She's not good at cooking, but she's definitely the best in inventing and instructing Nang Boning how to cook them! Moreover, I miss my cousin Tina's chocolate fudge (I now live in the US of A, seemingly the home of all sorts of desserts and goodies - you name it, they've got it; but none has compared to her goodies!). Best of all, I miss everything Mayong's. I've tasted practically every burger this country has to offer, but still nothing lives up to THE Mayong's cheeseburger!


MORE FAMILY. I'm a family person; I adore my family so much! The past year (or so) I feel I've been "deprived" of them. Don't get me wrong, I have family here. My husband and Leila are my family. My husband's family is here, too. They are my family. My sister and her hubby are also here. They are family. Some relatives - aunts, uncles, cousins - are here. They're family, too. But I miss the whole Rodriguez and Tan kaboodle. I miss the familiar "chaos" when everybody's around. I miss every conversation, every laughter, every story we all share when we get together. 


FRIENDS. I miss my friends/cousins. I miss my girls - I miss having them around when I need to de-stress or just rant about a bad day. I miss having them to share a good, big, delicious meal with. I miss how I can talk to them about anything and everything. I've made a lot of friends here the past year, most of them Asians, as well; well, Vietnamese at that! They're fun and we get to talk about anything and everything, too. But because we've just met over a year ago, the whole feeling of familiarity just isn't there yet or as much as I already share with old friends. Nonetheless, I feel blessed, as it is.


LINGKOD. I miss the community and all the brothers and sisters. I miss serving God through the community. I miss all the activities. I miss praying and worshipping God with the whole community. I miss the talks, retreats, workshops, everything community-related. It's just so different here. The closest I got to being involved with community was joining an old group (literally, OLD) for Wednesday novenas (while I was pregnant). Having Leila has become a handful, I don't ever go out of the house without her. It's not an excuse, it's reality for me now. 


However, by God's grace, I have about 58 days left to "miss" Ormoc because yes, I will see and experience Ormoc (everything and everyone in it) SOON. GOD WILLING!

It's almost been 2 years!

I cannot, for the life of me, understand why it took me too long to blog again. Don't get me wrong, I looooove this blog and I've always loved "writing". There are a gazillion excuses running through my brain right as to how I've just put aside my passion for writing all these months. It has to be said, though, I regret now having written, not having blogged, here sooner.

Yes, it's almost been two years! And I have to add, the past two years have been the most amazing, the most dramatic; yes, the MOST of all mosts happened the past almost-two years of my hiatus.

Quick rundown and recap since my last blog entry:

1) At the top of my head - well, like I mentioned already in my last entry, I was to be wed in August of last year, and yes, got married I did! I have to add - to the most amazing, most thoughtful, most loving, kindest person I know. And yes, we have been married for more than a year now and we look forward to celebrating more blissful years of married life!

2) I now have a gorgeous little angel - we named her Leila Maria. Yes, between my last entry and today, I got married, got pregnant immediately during our honeymoon in Hawaii (yes, Leila was "made in Hawaii", hence the seeming Hawai'ian name!), and gave birth to our beloved Leila Maria. She is now, as I blog, 5 months and 12 days old. And for certain, as much as I flooded my old entries with stories of the love of my life, the forthcoming entries will feature none other than the new love of my life, my daughter. :)

3) I now reside in Lake Balboa, California, in a small but beautiful home in the suburbs of Los Angeles County. Our home is about 20 minutes away from the crazy, busy LA life. Lake Balboa is in a valley (San Fernando) where life (and the streets) still get busy, but it is definitely on a slower pace compared to downtown LA. Yes, I've moved my entire life from the provincial life of Ormoc in the Philippines to its seeming American version here in the United States. I love how it still somehow reminds me of how small Ormoc is, how the supermarket is just a 5 minute drive away, the Church about 10 minutes, and relatives a bit farther off (but still not as far as I used to think - when I was back home in Ormoc).

4) My sister, Iana, who is also happily married and just recently found out she was pregnant (yiheeee!), lives about 50+ miles away from me. Huntington Beach is about an hour's drive away, but so far, it's been great for us! We see each other at least twice a month (either they drive up to see us or we drive down to see them!). The best part of this whole setup? My husband, Pancho, and hers, Carlo, have become such good buddies!

5) I have become the ultimate homemaker (or I try to, at least!). I cook, bake, do laundry, scrub the bathroom floors, vacuum, and do practically everything a good homemaker does! If you knew me five years ago, you would never think I'd end up as such (yes, I still surprise my own family!), but let me say, I love everything I do - every single day! I am content. Very content!

I may not have ended up where I thought I would (5, 10 years ago?) but I definitely know that I am meant to be where I am now, and I truly feel God's hand in everything. I feel so blessed, I cannot thank Him enough for everything.

Yes, from my last blog entry to this one, a LOT has changed. From being the super busy woman I was back home in Ormoc, running from one meeting to the next and being stuck in the office all day, I am now a content homemaker, spending my days at home, making it as spotless as posstible, cooking the best dish for my family, and tending to the most beautiful gifts I've been bestowed with, my husband and my daughter.

That's where the past year (or so) has been for me. I've been blessed.